I don’t really play poker. I love card games, but I never really learned poker. I understand the concept; I just didn’t really know anyone who played. I’m also not a gambler. Most likely, my control issues and having no desire to take risks play a part in that. But I seem to have found myself in the middle of a poker game.
I was driving home last night, thinking about all of the ‘excuses’ not to step outside my comfort zone. What if this doesn’t work? What if it only makes things worse? What if it’s not the right time? What if I can’t do it? I know how this usually plays out – I know that logically, the things I want aren’t likely to happen.
That’s when I heard, ‘I’ll see your ‘what if’s’, and raise you a ‘remember’.
It was one of those statements that made me think, ‘I’m really not going to like where this ends up…’
So…you don’t want to write a job proposal or do anything with it because you think you know how things will turn out. No one will really care about what you have to say or there will be too much red tape to make it happen. But what is the real reason? Fear. Remember: October 8, 2010 – You walked away from your job with nothing else lined up. Two months later, you were hired back to the exact same job. You didn’t think that would happen either for some of the same reasons. How did those two months change you? What made you enjoy the exact same job you were so ready to leave? Where would you be right now had you not taken the steps outside your comfort zone to either leave or go back? You overcame the fear, and things turned out fine – just different than what you expected.
You don’t want to pursue a relationship because you think you know how it will turn out. It doesn’t fit into the expectations you created. It doesn’t fit into your comfort zone. Those inconveniences will ultimately make the relationship impossible for the long term so you want to end it before it even begins. But what’s the real reason? Fear. Remember: Russia – That relationship should have never happened from a logical standpoint. It may not have ended the way you would have liked, but you can’t deny there’s a reason it happened. Where would you be if you had gotten married? What if you had never admitted that you were interested in a relationship at all? You stepped outside your comfort zone, and it may not have been perfect, but you learned and grew – just not in the ways you expected.
And let’s not forget the beach in Monterey. You set aside fear and discovered a part of you that had been locked away for a very long time. You took that next step in your journey and discovered that what you had been taught were some pretty big lies. How does it feel to be living in that freedom? You took a risk to search inside yourself, and you found beauty and strength – not at all what you expected.
Why do you still let fear win?
I’ll see your ‘what if’s’, and raise you a ‘remember’. It’s your call. Will you go all in or will you fold?